Chick fight!

I am not a typical girl. I have always been more of a tomboy, and have always gotten along better with men than I do with women.

At any party, I am more than likely hanging out with my male friends, while the women are all congregating in the living room, telling the same childbirth stories they have told a million times before, and complaining about what retards their husbands are. Having no desire for a child or a husband, I run from those conversations like a bat out of hell. Because eventually, they all turn to me and start telling me that I am some kind of nutjob because I don’t want to get married or have kids.

I love my married friends, and I love their kids. I just don’t necessarily want that for me.

That being said, I got in a huge fight with Kay on Saturday night about my lack of bitchy possessiveness in front of a bunch of our friends.

I went to dinner with five other friends, Kay and her husband DMX included. I was sitting between DMX and our other friend Briton, and we were joking about this website we were looking at that has these whacked porn clips.

Hey, I never said we were a sophisticated group.

So we’re all laughing, and the girls, all sitting together at the other end of the table, get pissed that we’re laughing and they don’t know why. They couldn’t tear themselves away from the Oprah wrap-up conversation they were having long enough to know what we were talking about.

When I explained a particular clip that we were laughing about (which was SO not dinner table conversation, and that’s why we were laughing about it like retards), Kay got completely disgusted and looked at me and said “Why can’t you just be a normal girl? Normal girls don’t watch porn and sit around and joke around with other guys about it!” Whatever. I am not exactly sure what a “normal” girl is, but apparently, her name’s not Andria.

Later on, back at Kay’s house, many drinks were had, and we decided to play some poker. Kay is always down for cards, but on this night, she decided that she was not going to do it, and didn’t want DMX doing it, either. In fact, she tried to forbid him from drinking anymore and playing cards.

I can’t stand naggy and/or controlling chicks (men, either, but that’s not what this is about), and I certainly don’t like it when they try to crack the whip in front of their friends to look like a bad ass, and that’s just what she did. I told her that the whole night was her idea, and to lay off.

BAD IDEA.

I could tell by the look on her face that what came next was not going to be nice. She came up to me, and asked me what do I know about relationships, since I wasn’t in one, and the last one ended because I let my ex run all over the place and do whatever he wanted, and what kind of girlfriend lets their boyfriend go out with his boys and go to strip clubs, and blah, blah, blah. Actually, she said some really fucked up things after that, but I don’t want to go into detail.

I am nobody’s mother, and I am certainly not going to try and tell a grown man what he can and can’t do. I am just not that way. Maybe that was the reason my last relationship ended, I don’t know. But I know I don’t want someone ordering me around, so I wouldn’t do it either.

Anyways, in one of my rare girly moments, I cried, which I hate doing. I feel like such a wuss for crying over shit like that, but she did say some really messed up things, and in front of other people, which really pissed me off.

She called the next morning and apologized after DMX told her all the shit she said. She was so bombed on martinis, she had no memory of any of it.

Sometimes girls make it really fucking hard to be friends with them.

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On a happy note, Jeff Gordon won the white trash superbowl, the Daytona 500!! YAY! for hot guys driving in circles for four hours. I love me some nascar. All my friends hate him, so it was particularly nice to rub it in all of their faces afterward.

I don’t know if any of you saw it, but a very obviously stoned (and hot) Matthew McConnaughey gave the best command to start the engines I have seen.

I want to play some naked bongos with that boy.

I also got flipped off on my way to work this morning by a crazed Tony Stewart fan who accused ME personally of cheating at the end of the race.

I love stupid people!!

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Lastly, I hope you all appreciated the Bowling Ball Stud pics in my last entry. I think I kick much ass for admitting I almost went out with that guy.

And Loopy was right. Boy, did I dodge a bullet with that one.